Politically speaking, an ideological line was drawn in the sand in 2008 and a year ago it cracked under the strain of the post-partisan presidency.  The “Lightworker” sent to heal our wounds and bring us all together in harmony, just like the old Coke commercial, wasn’t so post-partisan after all.  Republicans were shut out of committee meetings on pending legislation, and at one point Democrats literally changed the locks of a meeting room to keep Republicans out.  As the gap widened, common sense and fiscal responsibility fell down the hole, out of sight, out of fashion.

On one side of the crack were progressives, liberals, “regular” democrats, blue dog democrats, ideological college kids who’ve never had the pleasure of paying taxes and thought it was cool to not vote for “an old white dude,” non-political folks who got a good dose of Hope-n-Change and ordered a bumper sticker, and some disillusioned and hopeful (TM) republicans.  These folks bought into the Obamania and chanted “Yes we can!” and walked in lockstep towards a brighter tomorrow.  They were the ones they’d been waiting for.  What, you don’t understand what that means either?

Juxtaposed were dyed-in-the-wool republicans, people who vote republican because their parents do, people who vote republican because their parents don’t, neocons, fiscal conservatives, fiscal/social conservatives and libertarians.  We were the uncool crowd, the old curmudgeons who can’t stand “change,” we are racists, bigots and homophobes (which is ironic since Obama opposes gay marriage).  We are Jesse Helms, frozen in the 1950’s in a Sarah Palin-shaped jello salad.  We are socially awkward.  We don’t like to help people.  We are mean, old, unenlightened white people, typical white people, you know the kind. We are selfish and most importantly, we are too stupid to even know we’re all these horrible things.

I write the above paragraph, tongue firmly planted in my cheek.  Nothing could be farther from the truth.

What’s a conservative?  Consider the following:

1.  Conservatives are against “big” government.  Why?  Because the founders of this country did not design our government to perform all the duties it’s commandeered over the last 70 years.  The founders had a clear vision for this country, which was (and still is) the following:  The powers delegated to the federal government under the Constitution are “few and defined,” per James Madison. For example, the government was not intended to support a welfare state, nor any of the other entitlement programs such as Social Security, Medicare, or Medicaid. The federal government is charged with maintaining infrastructure and providing national defense.  Those two areas are the only areas whereupon we should be paying taxes.

2.  Conservatives believe in economic freedom and generous giving. We believe you should be able to live your life without the government holding your hand, intruding into your wallet or telling you what sort of light bulb you should be using “for the greater good.”  We support the idea that you might just know what’s best for you without us butting in and regulating your behavior.  We believe that people will help others (by the by, conservatives give 30% more to charity per year than liberals) if given the chance and the means.  We do not see taxes as altruistic, because if you’re going to take a “donation” from someone forcefully, it’s not really charity, now is it?

3.  Conservatives are against government waste and corruption. Why has the function of politician morphed from a civil service into a career, replete with multiple offices, multiple staffers, housing in DC, and in some cases (I’m looking at you, Nancy) the use of  US Air Force jets?  We also hate waste in the form of porked-up legislation (the Stimulus bill), extortion and blatant bribes such as the Louisiana purchase and the Nebraska Sell-Out.

Conservatives also believe in freedom of religion which means you can have your prayer mat and point towards the east five times a day, but you better also be cool with us leaving the 10 commandments up in public.  Conservatives live by the axiom “Less is more.”  You enjoy simplicity?  Conservatism is for you.  You enjoy common sense solutions to problems?  Conservatism is for you.  You abhor drama?  Conservatism is for you.  Are you frugal with money?  Conservatism is for you.  Do you hate the DMV?  ABSOLUTELY conservatism is for you.

We are conservative because we realize that the more the government grows, the more it creeps into our everyday lives, which equates to liberties lost.  We believe that less is more when it comes to rules and regulations on peoples’ lives.  We believe that Americans can and should take responsibility for themselves and not look to the government to solve their problems.  We believe the American people are a bright, determined, industrious group of individuals who don’t need a nanny telling them what to do with their lives.  We believe in freedom.

That said, I have a hard time understanding why folks are drawn to the left, where freedom always comes with a price.

You can have “free” health care BUT we’re going to be in charge of it and say who can have what and when they can have it.

You can live off welfare and government handouts, BUT you will become dependent on us and we’ll give you just enough to subsist and you’ll keep coming back for more because you’ll be stuck and won’t really have a choice.

We will “help” you save for your retirement, BUT you’re stuck getting our paltry 0.5%  interest rate, when you could invest privately and get a return average of 12%.  And no, you can’t opt out and invest it yourself.  We know best.

We will end global warming climate change, BUT it will require your power bill to increase by 92% and we will levy heavy taxes on businesses who will then pass the burden onto you, the consumer.  We are not sure how taxes will end global warming err, climate change so for right now, instead of calling them “taxes” we’re just going to call them “carbon indulgences.”

We will give you a free education, BUT you need to keep your First Amendment right in your cubby/locker at all times.

We will help create jobs, BUT we really can’t – that’s something only the private sector can do.  BUT a “green jobs initiative” sounds really great, doesn’t it?

Hope for change in 2010.